how i work through anxiety & fears πŸŒ±

hey guys! welcome back to maggie’s doodles πŸ’šβœ¨ today i’m sharing some of the ways i work through anxiety and fears!

this is a topic i want to address whenever i can, because i’ve had times of stress, anxiety, fear, and overwhelm since 2009. there have been seasons of my life where i really didn’t know if i’d ever be able to have a happy, comfortable existence again because my fears and anxieties were so strong.

but i’m sharing with you today that it is possible to enjoy your life again! when you combine your effort, support from others (counselors & friends), and therapeutic techniques, sooo much can change for the better πŸ₯°

here are some other inspirational posts i’ve written that i’d encourage you to check out after this post ✨ (or if you’d like to read one of these instead of this one, that’s good too!)

**all these tips and ideas shared here are drawn from my personal experiences! they are not medical or professional advice, so please talk to your doctor about concerns you have regarding your own situation**

how i work through
anxiety & fears 🌱

let’s walk through this together!

⇨ Identify the type of fear: is it irrational or valid? //

this is a very important first step! by figuring out which one it is, that will enable you to proceed in feeling so much better. because if, for example, you have a fear of being stung by a bug, there’s a possibility of that when you’re around those bugs. you can take steps to managing your fear without thinking this is dumb, that won’t even happen.

by putting your fear in its rightful place, you’ll avoid falling back into it.

for me, i’ll find many of my fears are valid- but out of control. i’ve had a bad fear of spiders on and off, and some of my fear is valid because spiders can bite you. but being terrified at the thought of going outside, not comfortable inside the house, and having joint pain and headaches from my fear? those are signs of my fear spiraling out of control.

⇨ How can I manage the fear more comfortably? //

one thing that’s helped me for a long time is a quote from a psychology study. it said: “you can’t feel scared and calm at the same time.” for some reason, that was revolutionary to me! it helped me to regain control of my emotions and feelings. instead of feeling terrified and throwing some calming techniques into the mix, by calming myself, i was no longer feeling that fear.

when i have spiraling anxious and fearful thoughts, one of the most helpful things for me is having a phrase. it can be a quote from someone else, or something i discovered while working on feeling better. i’ll remind myself of that quote whenever my thoughts try to take me away, and it helps so much!

here are some examples of quotes i’ve used:

  • when i’m scared of spiders, i’ll think: it’s okay, because i’m going to do everything i’m able to to avoid walking into a web
  • when i’m anxious about learning a new skill, i’ll think: i can’t know something i haven’t learned yet
  • when i’m scared i wasted money, i’ll think: if being hard on myself worked, it would have worked by now

when i know for certain i’ve done everything in my power to protect myself and learn from the things i’m going through, i let go of as much guilt and suffering as i can.

⇨ I change how I talk about the fear //

this is the one that broke my fear of spiders!

so when i get freaked out by one, it’s usually because i’m intimidated by it. my two ways of referencing spiders was usually ‘a teeny spider’ and ‘a HUGE SPIDER.’ by using those descriptive words, i was not afraid of the former and COMPLETELY disabled by the latter, haha!

i read an article a while back (and i can’t find it now ;-; but i’ll tell you the best bits) that said how we talk about our fears dictates how we feel about them. so by me saying ‘huge spider,’ i was accidentally scaring myself!

when i dropped the adjectives, my fear dropped immensely. i started calling all spiders, regardless of shape or size lol, quite simply, a spider. and it worked into chilling out my brain!

⇨ Face it until I can manage it //

i know for a fact that it’s tiring, annoying, and sad to think about my fears all the time. so the thought of spending more time thinking about them to manage/face them is unappealing. but friend! that’s what i had to do to get my peace and life back, and i really hope you’ll be able to do the same.

here are some closing thoughts for this post:

  • it’s ok to have relapses. my fear of spiders flares up when there are more of them outside! by expecting relapses, you’ll prepare yourself to handle them. in my opinion, the goal should not be to ‘cure’ our fears (mainly valid ones). as we focus on handling them when they come up, that will better equip us to handle them on a regular basis
  • you are not the only one who has fears and anxiety. i have to remind myself of this one all the time. there’s something very isolating about fear, where you really feel like you’re the only person on the planet who’s scared. i just looked it up and over 40 MILLION adults in the US alone have anxiety!! like~ fear is a liar, y’all. you got this, i got this
  • healing & managing take time. not my favorite thing to hear when it comes to positive growth. but it’s ok! you gotta give your brain time to break old habits and make new ones. you’ll retrain your mind, slowly change your lifestyle, and make new thought patterns. please don’t give up when healing isn’t instant. with anything, positive or negative, our brains have to get in a rhythm. i believe in you πŸ€—

accountability partner

do you need someone to walk with on this journey? someone who can keep you accountable, cheer you on, and inspire you? i’d love to be that person!

just fill out the form below. you can share who you are, or remain anonymous. you can share in the form if you want me to respond or not. you can also reach me on my contact page! we can talk about what we’re both working on and be there for each other. i’ll help you as much as i can πŸ’š

thank you soo much for reading! i hope you have a wonderful week 😊

did this post help you?
which inspirational posts
should i write next?

16 thoughts on “how i work through anxiety & fears πŸŒ±”

  1. these are really good tips! πŸ’– also, you’re so brave for showing your vulnerable side on the internet, imo that’s a huge thing to do, and you’re not alone! i think why most people are scared of spiders is because their movements are so unnatural and sudden. my friend calls them ‘spooders’ πŸ˜†
    I mean I can’t say that with a straight face! good job on this post πŸ˜˜πŸ’•πŸ‘

    Liked by 2 people

    1. aww thanks! i appreciate that sm πŸ₯Ίβ€οΈ i loved writing this post!!
      ah fr. and they got too many legs aha- β€˜spooders’! that’s great
      thank youu! *hugs*

      Liked by 1 person

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